Write about something presently in your life that is “worth it”
Enjoy the music while you read! (Do you like the new color?)
When I first read this question, the answer jumped out at me so fast that I hardly had time to think about it. I waited a couple of days to see if it would change as I mulled over this prompt but the answer never changed.
One of the downsides to growing up and idolizing my favorite characters from my favorite anime is adopting their ideals. As a kid, I thought these people were the definition of what being a good person. Courageous, fearless. thoughtful, and selfless were the qualities that they displayed and I wanted to be them so bad. For me, I did not have a father or mother figure. I had my grandparents but I am a testament to the notion that they no one can replace your parents. Others can fill the role but it nothing like knowing them.
With my father gone and mother basically abandoning me, I never wanted someone to feel that way because of my actions. I wanted to be someone who you could depend on. Someone who was there when you needed him most. Someone who wouldn’t let you down.
However, the youthful me did not know exactly what that translated to in real life.
So, for my friends and family, I always made the sacrifice. I denied myself the things I wanted to ensure those around me were good. I have so many stories about situations like these that I could probably write a book on it. The problem with this mindset was that it conflicted with others interest and placed me in horrible situations. Having to choose between my love at the time and my best friends. Having to choose my own sanity over aiding the woman that never did anything for me. Choosing to pursue my career and my dream or to stay with the one I loved. Not to turn this is a pity party but I have been devastated by this more than anything else. And honestly, I have nothing to show for all the things I did after all these years. It has all crashed and burned, ashes being swept away by the currents of time.
I don’t regret my decisions. I knew where my heart was when I made them. But I do acknowledge that I should have thought of what I wanted and considered my needs.
All of that changed when my girlfriend and I split.
It was after that horrible event that I decided to drift away from everyone and do my own thing. And adjusting to living alone and for myself was the pivotal moment in my life that set me on a better path. I learned how to save money the right way and plan for events. I started going out more and enjoying the things I wanted to do. I started reviewing restaurants, movies, and anime. I began traveling to see all the friends I had made over the years over the internet through role-playing and/or gaming. I joined community forums and became active in forums.
And it still feels weird at times. Doing things alone that is. I am a very social person and I love experiencing things with people, especially those who are close to me. But I have met so many new people by venturing out on my own that I can’t imagine myself ever doing that again. The things I have done in the last few years like traveling to see one of my best online friends in Texas to venturing hours out to try unique restaurants have been some of the most fun I have ever had. I even Uber from time to time just as a social experiment and I have met some wonderful people.
So in closing, getting out there and experiencing life will always be worth it to me. Now, I stuff my day with so much stuff that I usually end up planning too much.
Thanks for stopping by and reading! I seriously appreciate it! I hope you enjoyed this post. What is the thing in your life that you think is “worth it”? Let’s talk about in the comments below!
Until the next post…
girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes,
snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes,
silver-white winters that melt into springs,
these are a few of my favorite things.