How do you act when you are afraid?
Well, here is something I don’t really want to share with the world but whatever, this was the random topic I landed on in the book and we will discuss it in detail! Oh boy! This is going to be good! I knew you would enjoy something like this…
I am, by default, a person who can be scared easily. I feel like individuals with vivid imaginations who don’t know how to stay grounded in reality are the ones that can be scared to easiest. At least, that is how it is for me. Usually, I’m not scared by the situation that someone or something could be in. I am scared by the atmosphere. The mood that leads up to the jump scare or scary moment because it is in those moments, that my mind conjured the worse possible nightmares and they run rampant in my mind until it is over.
And this is sad because this is considered cheap horror that relies on frights like jump scares or cliche monsters. Our modern sense of horror is usually fleeting. They scare you and when you leave the experience, you laugh and joke about how silly it was to be scared.
Imagine how I handle shows, movies, and games that deal in psychological horror. The horror that lingers!
If you don’t know what I am talking about, let me explain. The type of horror that lingers in your mind after the experience is over with. The horror that makes you question whether or not it could actually exist. This is called The Uncanny. Is it the feeling that something is just wrong. Something is out of place and shouldn’t belong. I learned about this type of horror from Extra Credits.
An example of this is would be a flickering light at the end of the street or into a room. Have you wondered why it makes you feel ominous? It is because you know it isn’t supposed to be there. So it makes you tense and because of that, you go out of your way to look around and search for anything else that could be wrong. The short teaser game P.T. was a brilliant game that used this. It is the reason why I won’t play Gone Home despite knowing nothing is actually scary. Silent Hill is another game that I couldn’t play!
This type of horror drives me insane and usually, Japanese horror often indulges in this type of horror and I wasn’t able to watch any of them. Why? Because they explore the horror that makes you do all the work and my mind is prone to taking over. They know how to build the tension and use it to their advantage. It makes you build the fear. You are anticipating the scare moment and every time it doesn’t happen, it puts you on edge. You know it is coming. You just don’t know when. And this is enhanced because usually the entire setting is made to make you feel uncomfortable. The world is off. Your vision is limited. You hear sounds off in the distance.
And I hate this when it is done right, it leaves me mumbling idiot. I have a tendency to fall back on humor when I am uncomfortable. I start cracking jokes when I am nervous or scared even when I know joking probably isn’t the most appropriate thing to do. I have done this at funerals. I have done this during movies. I do this by myself when I’m uneasy. In my mind, humor is the remedy to most of life’s problems. If I can laugh about it, then I can deal with it. When I cannot, I’m usually screwed.
I also start to mumble and ramble. I start to say things that don’t make sense or my inner thoughts come out as a jumbled mess which has gotten me in trouble several times with people. It just happened yesterday. After conveying my feelings to someone that was very special to me, I was cut off from giving my entire confession and was told that we would talk about it later. The anticipation from that conversation is currently driving me mad and my mind has gone off on a tangent of all the reasons why it is taking too long and the meaning behind this delay. This accidentally slipped when she was talking to her a friend and I overheard her mention going to see Glass when we got back home. I, stupidly, said, “Are we going to see Glass or are you guys going to see Glass.” And received a look of “What are you talking about” or rather “Why are you eavesdropping on our conversation. Tension like this drives nuts.
As I have leveled up in age, I have a build a sense of courage to watch these films and play these games. Or at the very least watch someone else play. I don’t like knowing there are things out there that I am afraid of that would make me avoid doing something. Especially when I haven’t tried it before. My fears won’t conquer me in that way. I can promise that. Afraid of heights? I’m jumping off something high. Can’t swim? I getting water regardless.
But the fear of anticipation has always won the battle. I usually lose to it each and every time. I’m kinda ashamed of it but no one is perfect and if this is one of my imperfections, I will take it. Now it is time for me prepare myself for The Promised Neverland!
What are some of the things that scare you? How do you act when you are scared and by extension, nervous? I’d love to talk about it in the comments below. As always, thank you guys for stopping by and reading. You gals and guys are awesome!
Until the next post… The featured image is seriously creepy at night…